Not Another Newsletter!

And More Significant Ways We're Out of Control

If we're not on the frontlines, like healthcare workers (I mean heroes), and lucky enough not to be caring for a loved one with Covid-19 or suffering from it ourselves, then I think the next hardest thing about the pandemic is that now we know how out of control we really are.

A few short months ago, our kids went to school. We had plans for the summer. If we wanted to hug a friend we could do so without worrying about endangering the life of someone removed by six degrees of separation. If we ran out of milk, we could go grab some. And if we needed a night off—choose your poison—downing drinks at your favorite bar/sitting knee-deep in a sundae at your favorite ice cream shop (me! me!)/ losing yourself in a film at a movie theater/hooking up on Tinder, we could do so.

That all disappeared and we weren't prepared and there wasn't one thing we could do.

This might all sound like small stuff—and it is, that's why I started with the folks who are really taking names and kicking butt on the Corona front—but that doesn't mean it's nothing.

Being out of control is associated with a host of emotional reactions and symptoms, up to and including depression. What I want to say to everyone—myself included—is, It's okay to not be okay. It's even okay to want your damn doughnut.

And then, of course, we have to acknowledge our privilege, keep a gratitude journal—according to this article, over 11,000 studies show that feeling gratitude is connected to overall health and wellbeing—and buckle down and help in the ways we are able.

Love our families and take care of them as best we can.

Smile when we do see others—even from behind a mask, it's possible to tell.

Give what we can when we can. A woman approached us in a deserted parking lot a few weeks ago. She was struggling to put food on the table. It wasn't much, but we bought her dinner that night.

Find ways to enjoy life no matter how out of control it is at the moment. Below are two of mine. What are yours?

Book Mail

It's like Christmas morning when a book comes (and is left for several hours to kill any viral particulates, sprayed with alcohol, and finally opened. What, was that not implied?)

Here are a few goodies I received in May, available now to buy or pre-order:

Spiked by Jon McGoran

Sister Dear by Hannah Mary McKinnon

The Chicken Sisters by Kj Dell'antonia

Also note that these book links are to bookshop.org, "an online bookstore with a mission to financially support local, independent bookstores." Now that's a cause I can get behind!

Baking

I bake muffins that contain less sugar and more whole grains. Who knew this hobby would turn out to be so pandemic-ready? Now my baked goods are the only ones we eat, so I've had to branch out. Here's a pic of my latest, courtesy of my brother-in-law, who's taking names and kicking butt in the kitchen and inspired me to try YEAST.

Any cooking firsts for you since the pandemic? Just glad to get a sandwich on the table at dinnertime? Believe me, that's me too. Only now I might try to make the bread.

So, How About That Pub Date?

My brilliant, outside-the-box publisher took a good, hard look at marketing plans for The Second Mother, and well, the state of the world, and decided to move my release to August 18th.

I give talks to writers about how to publish—traditional, indie, or hybrid? Since I truly don't believe one is better than the other, I use a questionnaire and personal conversations to help writers find their way to the path that will fit them best.

One aspect of traditional publishing is the writer doesn't have as much control over things like publication schedule. I feel lucky that my release date has been based on close examination of the book and my hoped-for career trajectory.

I'm trying to think of things I can do in case my in-real-life tour can't happen. I'd love to hear ways you'd like to connect with authors during this time. Maybe I can meet you virtually, or your book club, or women's group. The sky's the limit—send me an idea!